A New Fantasy Experience

Rant #2 of the Recently Hired

If you missed Rant #1, it’s because it took place in my car as I drove home from “training” and was violently unpublishable.

I’ll make this short.

Having been trained many different times, in many different places, but for similar tasks, I think I have noticed a discouraging trend.  (This mainly pertains to retail environments and deals with check out procedures)  While stores seem to brag about their “thorough” training and great staff, I have been exposed – repeatedly –  to woefully lax training procedures.  I have not been to one job yet that explained their cash registers (buttons, on-screen prompts, field navigation, etc.) enough before setting me in front of anxiously waiting customers that were frothing at the mouth with their hopeful purchases clutched to their bosoms.  I always HOPE that the next time I am trained, that I will be walked through the details, so that I will have the confidence to smile and ring up the merchandise with, at least, minimal confusion.  But, alas! It seems that I will never experience that kind of immersive  training.

Even the biggest retail chains will plop me down in front of the register facing the most public aisle; point at a few buttons and say hit this, this, and this without explaining what “this” is or Why I should hit it at this particular prompt; will fly through the on-screen wording like it is some sort of speed-reading contest; and then step away quickly with a polite “call me if you need me” speech, only to disappear as soon as a line of customers appears.

And, I’ve noticed that, for some reason, no matter how “slow” a section of the store or day of the week is reputed to be, as soon as I am stationed on a register, it becomes “unusually” busy!  Even the trainers grumble about how it is NEVER this busy this time of day, or this day of the week, or ….whatever.

I know why it is busy.  It’s my curse!  IF I’m unsure, untrained, un-confident in what I’m doing…sure enough!… I’ll be swamped by complications and mumbling people.  It has happened at everyplace that I have ever worked. I always hope that the next one will be better, but it’s not.  I step up to a register and the curse kicks in.  I’m like a beacon to masses of the disgruntled, the hurried, and the non-English-speaking patrons of the world! The aisles become clogged like arteries after Thanksgiving, and I have to stand there, tapping the register keys incomprehensively, and mumbling that it’s my first day while I weep into the intercom for back-up.

“May I help you? *sob*”

End Rant #2.


2 responses

  1. Oh gosh, I’ve been there hun! It’s not just retail, they do it EVERYWHERE! I’ve had trainers who had no clue what they were doing and openly admitted it. They usually sucker some poor sap to do the training because they don’t believe you’ll be staying anyway.


    November 24, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    • It sure seems that way! LOL I think the best training I ever got was in Costuming at Universal. Frannie was my trainer and she trained everybody. She was sweet and patient and stuck with us until we leapt from the Nest on our own, haha! I guess that experience spoiled me 🙂


      November 24, 2013 at 9:12 pm

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